Today's words come to you hand in hand - one I have too much of, the other I need loads of to get rid of the first one! Can you guess which way round? Yup - too much weight, not enough willpower - the same problem so many of us have these days.
I have managed to give up smoking though so although I had medical help with that and it felt easy (Champix tabs are fab!), I do at least feel a little better in and of myself for doing it. Now I just have to show myself I can give up naughty snacks like crisps and chocolate bars.
At the top end of the 'ideal' weight range for my height, I'm maybe 25-30 pounds over. I remember being exactly the recommended weight for my height only a few times in my life but being at the top end of the range was my normal level until about 10 years ago. I've been trying to think why it should have suddenly piled on but all I can really recollect is that coincided with me taking a year off work to travel. I was probably more active then than before that too - I used to walk a lot when travelling but I guess I ate at restaurants a lot too.
This pic was taken just 2-3 years ago - I don't know what happened but somewhere along the line, I'd worn those large jeans and they were snug on me. The second picture is the new jeans I bought at the time of the photo and after about 6 Pilates lessons. I hadn't consciously been trying to lose weight but obviously something worked!
I still have those baggy jeans and I'm happy to report, they are still pretty baggy on me! The tight jeans are very tight though so if I don't want to bust the seams, I have to lose some pounds soon!
These days I am in full control of my own food choices (I don't have to please anyone else with a menu) so all I have to do now is cook with less fat/oil and increase the level of vegetables and fruit. I've been trying stir frys - lots of veg just cooked fast with noodles in very little oil. The downside of that though is that it doesn't keep me from being hungry a few hours later so I end up snacking if I'm not careful.
I also joined a gym late last summer and I did well for a couple of months, loosing 1 pound a week on average. Then I had a crazy week at work before a trip, the trip and of course, a couple of catch up crazy weeks at work again when I got back. Somewhere in there was a surprise short notice operation date and all hell broke loose again as I tried to get ahead on stuff at work. Add in Christmas and a birthday, going back to work and catching up then another trip as soon as I was well enough and as you can imagine, I slacked off even going to the gym!
I've rejoined now though - I have maybe 4 months before my job contract finishes and I head Stateside, so it's full steam ahead. Time to get fit, lose some weight and firm up the flabby bits. I even managed some running on the treadmill this time. I used to prefer the distance running at school so I'm thinking I may even manage a 5k race one day. Yeah I know! I've only managed to run twice this week and not for very far and I'm already thinking of a 5k?
I may never do a race but having it dangling out there ahead of me as something to achieve does help me keep going. I always say, if you don't have dreams, ideas and goals, you may as well be dead. I'm not going to dream of being skinny though, that way lies eating problems and depression. I was never slim, even as an active, always outdoors child, it's just not my body type and I can accept that. But I do want to feel better about myself and I know I feel a sense of achievement when my weight drops, my muscles are more defined and my clothes fit and feel better on me. Wish me luck!
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